1. Whistling
This rural way of approaching ladies is undoubtedly very common with area/garage or agbero boys. They authoritatively approach ladies by calling her as if they are calling a gala or ice cream seller. Many a times, I begin to wonder if they ever think any ego personified lady will ever stoop so low to give such guys attention let alone audience, except he does that right from his Range Rover Sport ;D . Them go be like, mpeeeeeeeew !! Duro si ibe yen (stop there) wtf is that? !!!!
2. Telling their Biographies
As awkward as it sounds, some dudes will walk up to a lady and will begin to introduce themselves with the provision of irrelevant details with the intention of advertising themselves. They will start telling their biographies ranging from the weight of their bank accounts, the fleet of cars owned by their parents, the size of their joysticks and how many minutes they can last in bed. Who ask them? ;D
3. Paying Her Fare by Force
This is very common in public transport and I don’t see anything bad in it. It is only bad when a dude volunteers to pay a lady’s fare for the purpose of collecting her phone number afterwards, and by the time the lady refuses, such guys won’t be able to collect their money back from the conductor, therefore, they resort to social media to show their frustration on other.
4. Stalking Her Everywhere
I used to be very guilty of this barbaric act of selling one cheaply to a lady until maturity had its way. When you approach a lady and she decides to keep mum just to make you look foolish. Instead of you to protect your self esteem by parting ways with her since she’s not interested, instead, you will keep stalking her around even if she’s trekking from Lagos to Benin, you will not back off untill she enters her house. This is an height of joblessness
5. Sending someone to help collect her phone number
In as much as it is not easy to approach a random lady in public places, only cowards approach ladies they barely know by sending someone else to summon up courage to go tap the lady and ask for her phone number. To be very candid, guys who are guilty of this act of cowardice need some strokes of cane on the buttocks.
6. Rough-handling Her
It’s very immor*l to rough-handle a lady who ignores you. I have witnessed a scene when a lady registered a slap worth 50kg on the face of a dude who touched her buttocks because she didn’t give him listening ears.
7. Blowing Grammar
This tactics usually worked in those days but in 2016, I doubt. We are now in the era when the worth of a man is not measured by his good use of tenses and dictions but by riches and wealth. Approaching a lady by forming Yankee accent and blowing grammar like Hon. Patrick Obahiaghon just to impress a lady is a silly thing to do. Funny enough, they even get bashed despite their forming ;D
8. Flashing Cars keys
No matter how bad we paint ladies, it’s very paramount to know that not all of them are money mongers that can easily be cornered in one’s room by perishable parameters. However, some dudes who don’t have what it takes to show their worth as a man always wallow in the mentality that money is all you need to woo a lady, therefore, they flash car keys at any slight opportunity when trying to approach a lady selling it’s their selling point. This is a barbaric and Disgust*ng act.
9. Sagging of Trouser
Some guys can be childish that when they’re about to approach a girl the first thing they do is sag their trousers just to form bad guys. They are usually dumb headed that have nothing sensible to say to keep a conversation, therefore, they will start telling stories of how Muritala was assassinate and how GEJ looted the nation’s money to finance 2015 election.
10. Waving hands like a Traffic Warden
How can a dude be chilling in front of his house and will signal to a lady using his hand without even making attempt to stand up and at least walk up to her. He remains on his seat expecting the lady to come and meet him right where he is setting. (Na so e easy reach? ;D ). This awkward approach is very common with Ibadan boys. ;D
I drop my pen at this point
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